Tuesday 1 December 2015

Cushion Covers Galore!



I couldn't resist buying and embellishing some more cushion covers. The simplest was the blue and white 'sampler' design, I used a stitch directory and worked various stitches in lines across the cover. I love how gentle and simple it looks as a design. The large rose motif was probably the most challenging, but it was interesting to work with a knitting yarn,  it has produced a lovely soft surface on the satin stitch. I have already written about the 'doodle' cushion at the top here. Safe to say that it's all about bright colours and varying stitches.




Cushion covers are such a nice thing to work on, they immediately add a touch of individuality to a room and they are just the right size for a striking design. It's special too to have something that has been hand made, these all took a lot of time and consideration, and I hope it shows in the final product. I'm sure it won't be long before I succumb to the temptation to get hold of another one to work on. It seems, though, that our cushion quota is almost filled so I might need to rehome some before they start to breed again.




I'd love to actually sell some of these, so if you might be interested in some one of a kind homewares please let me know and we can discuss a custom order or you could even purchase one of these... I can produce these for between £25 - £40 depending on the style and requirements
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You can contact me via the contact page on here if you'd like, or leave a comment and I'll get back to you as swiftly as I can. I do hope you like these designs, I'd love to know what you think!





Monday 16 November 2015

Travels with a toddler: The Cotswold Motoring Museum

The Cotswolds in early autumn was resplendent. Bright, warm colours, quaint village scenes, golden willow boughs bending to brush the water of rushing streams and all the other bucolic autumnal things you can imagine. Jem and I arrived in the village of Bourton-on-the-Water imagining that it would be a little known, pretty little village - we were wrong! This pretty little village was certainly not unknown to the coachloads of visitors from home and abroad. I had already found that in this part of the world everyone seems to drive 10mph slower than anywhere else, but now, I was actually mainly moving at 0mph to avoid maiming the innocent tourists who had to stand in the very middle of the narrow village road in order to get the perfect selfie. (To be quite fair we did the exact same thing a couple of hours later and I would heartily recommend it.) The thing about being a tourist in autumn is that sometimes you find yourself to be the only visitor to a place, and, while that sounds ideal, I actually find it pretty awkward. Anyway, I took the crowds of visitors as nothing but a good sign.

We had come to meet up with my old friend Emma and to visit the Cotswold Motoring Museum. Emma and I both felt a little silly that we - the girls - would be visiting a car museum without our partners, but there was something about Brum on the publicity material so we couldn't miss it.

Naturally, though being in a pretty little village with probably the highest concentration of tearooms per square mile I've ever seen, we decided that we simply must go for tea before and after. People, you haven't lived until you've sipped tea and eaten a smoked salmon sandwich while surrounded by pretty mismatched vintage crockery and furniture. Even Jem loved it - and he's not one for sitting around while I sip tea.

The motoring museum was amazing. This has to be one of the most interesting, well put together and one of the most fun museums I have ever been to. It is crammed full of exhibits documenting not only the motor cars but also the wider culture and social history of the 20th century. Some of the assets have been meticulously restored so as to be spotless. Others are displayed approximately 'as found' which allows the visitor to see something of the backstory. Many of the exhibits are shown with stories about who used them - some written by the owners themselves. Besides cars there were motorbikes, motoring accessories, bicycles, signage, the list could go on. We even saw actual Brum - Emma was somewhat starstruck. I cannot do justice in writing to how much of a treasure trove this is. The best part for Jem was that not only does the museum include a toy collection, but it has an adorable little play area, including a play-garage and a chance to drive Brum!

Having exhausted ourselves in the museum we retreated to another tearoom, where over tea and cake I managed to become Emma's first customer. Emma is an artist and has recently started offering drawings on commission. She made me two pieces, one of Jem and I together, that she drew from a photo on my phone, and another of Jem taken from life. I've had them framed now, and I think they're absolutely incredible. This is her professional facebook page - please check it out and give her a 'like'.

So in conclusion, I would like to move to Bourton-on-the-Water.
Apologies that you can see me in the reflection - but doesn't he look cute?!

Friday 13 November 2015

Participating

Church can be difficult at the moment. With a one-year-old who likes to squirm, screech, thunder around, climb the pews and harass other children, sometimes there aren't enough books or raisins in the world (let alone my bag) to keep him calm enough for me to focus. We have to compromise a little. Sometimes I can't listen fully to the readings or the sermon because I have to take him out and calm him down. Sometimes I can't kneel throughout the Eucharistic prayer as I'd like because he needs my attention. Sometimes I can't concentrate and pray because I have to help him read his book.

Even without a toddler to deal with, it can be hard to participate fully. Everyone has things on their mind, worries and distractions that can take the mind off in another direction. Sometimes we can't share in the sacrament for the knowledge that there is sin in our lives. Even though I know that I have no choice but to continue looking after my son, even when I am at Mass, it can make me feel inadequate.

But there is one moment that I know I can participate in fully, even from the back of church chasing Jem around, even when I should have gone to confession, even when I've lost concentration during the prayers, even when I've already forgotten what the sermon was about.

Kneeling, the congregation repeats the words said by a centurion beseeching Christ to heal his servant:

"Lord, I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof," and we continue "but only say the word, and my soul shall be healed."

Thus, we make a final act of contrition before receiving Christ in the bread and wine, we acknowledge not only our unworthiness, but Christ's love and mercy. They are words for the sinner. 

We do not go to Mass because we deserve the sacraments. We do not approach Jesus perfect. We turn to him, and beg him to approach us. Sinners.

I once wrote a couple of lines about this: 

How can I stand here before you? - a sinner
Yet it is us whom you call - sinners all

Wednesday 28 October 2015

Rosy and the Lily

Rosy held her ice-cream in one hand and reached out with the other to touch the wall. The stone her hand found was different from the others, smooth and white. Tiny grey cracks navigated across the surface. The stone curved away gently as she ran her fingers over it; it was somehow soft. It made her think of a person. A picture fused together in her mind: a young man with reddish hair and shining blue eyes. He stopped, out of breath and looked at her. 

William was panting. He could feel the evening shadows creeping up his back as he crossed the cobbled town square. He could sense in the tingling cold that the church bell was about to chime. A nervous feeling welled up in his somach, but he pushed it sown again. Even if he was late, she was worth it. He ran towards the shrinking blue sky.

Glancing up the hill, he could see, just rising through the treetops, the smoking chimneys of home. Mother and Father must be dressing for dinner, if he could sneak in through the servants' hall they might never know - Annie could be trusted to keep him right, she was her best friend. 

Even while he was running he found a moment to close his eyes and he thought of her face - his Lily-girl. He could feel so intensely the sway of her hair against his skin. The warmth that radiated from her whan she smiled and the peace of knowing that she was waiting for him, that she had promised to wait. If he hadn't been running, he would have leapt for joy. 

The river, as he came close to it, whispered in tones as low and soft as Lily's. He stopped for a moment to catch his breath and watch the orange sparkle of the setting sun on the water. His hands pushed off from the warm stone walls as he took off again, smiling to himself. "What's the harm in telling them tonight," he thought "they'll come around. They'll have to."

His feet, in thin leather boots thumped painfully on the cobbles. A memory flashed through his mind. A cart and two horses, crashing, breaking, falling. Just as it formed into a thought, he felt his ankle give way beneath him. He stumbled on the uneven surface and grappled with the turbulent ground as he tumbled over and over and through the break in the wall where the horses had fallen to their deaths. He saw the shallow rapids rushing towards him.

A clear film of water flowed over William's face. There was barely any blood, just a single trickle dissipated into the brook. When the grocer found him he said that he looked as peaceful as an alabaster tomb. 

Rosy felt an icy trickle on her hand. She looked down. The ice-cream was melting away. She hurried it to her lips but before she could bring it close enough the pink scoop slid off the cone and landed with a splat. For a moment she watched as pink streams formed and meandered in the gullies between the cobbles. Then all of a sudden she began to wail. "Daddy! It fell!" Her eyes filled with tears.

She felt his strong arm around her. He lifted her up until she could see over the wall to the river below.

"Poor Rosy-girl. You have to eat it quickly, see?" He said holding up a half finished cone of mint-choc-chip . But the girl's attention was elsewhere. On the wall at the side of the bridge lay a perfect white bloom. A single lily.



A friend gave me a challenge to write a short story containing the following objects: a lily, a skull and an ice-cream cone. It was difficult to find a way to put all of those things together while keeping to my own style, but eventually, it sparked an idea which in the end I really loved. The process was lots of fun, and hopefully you've enjoyed the end result. I'd love to try another challenge, similar to this or different, let me know in the comments if you have any suggestions. If you liked this story, you might like my book - available on amazon kindle (you only need a browser or smartphone to read it) anyway the ad is on the right.

Travels with a Toddler: Knole Park

A young stag nibbles at a branch - with such elegance
A couple of weeks ago, along with a group of family members including three toddlers (!) Andy, Jem and I visited the National Trust Property at Knole Park in Sevenoakes. The house was originally an Archbishop's palace and is home to some stunning artefacts including some incredibly ornate textiles, an impressive collection of historical portraits, unique pieces of furniture, porcelain... I could go on - it's breathtaking. The house, though is dwarfed by its surroundings, a medieval deer park that stretches on for miles - or at least much further than we could ever have walked that day!

The grounds are really the star attraction, deer that are so tame that they pose for photographs, picturesque views that make you forget that you're right by the center of town. We loved exploring outside, I had a ball taking photographs of the deer - I'm not sure everyone was so pleased to wait around for me.

Going there with little children was not a problem so long as we were willing to make some small sacrifices. Inside the house we were asked to swap our baby carrier - we had a frame carrier (like a large backpack) for a soft carrier, they had plenty to lend out but if I had realised in advance I probably would have been more comfortable using my own. We chose a beautiful autumn day to make our visit, so the weather was not a consideration and there are some easy paths outside for buggies - naturally none of our little ones wanted to spend much time in the buggy. Jem would tell you that the paths were crawlable but slow going!

I hope you enjoy these few pictures. Let me know what you think - feel free to leave a comment.
This stately stag was caught napping, but
obliged me by surveying his kingdom
Posing for his close up




Chimneyscape



Probably my favourite image from the day, a young stag in the bracken.

Monday 26 October 2015

Beginning to Weave...

I've found a new obsession! Weaving fascinates me, it's not only design and use of colour, there's a geometry and underlying - almost subconscious - mathematics to it that is causing an addiction. I am enjoying working different patterns and shapes to find out what I can create.

I found a great tutorial that was really helpful in going through the basic techniques (and essentially - the vocabulary) and asked my father-in-law to help me make a loom based on the instructions there (basically some nails in a board). His idea though, was to make a loom bigger and better than I could have asked for, so I now have this beautiful oak peg loom with copper pins, on which I have so far completed about three decorative pieces and have already started the next.

It was only after I had commissioned my loom and started my experimentation that my own Dad said "Oh you're interested in weaving, would you like a loom?" It turns out he has been holding onto the loom that my Gran used when she learnt to weave. It's bigger and more complex than my own, so I'll have to spend some time researching how to use it.

I'll be taking my first weaving class this week, I can't wait to find out more about this timeless craft.


Adventures in weaving - from prep through working on the loom to finished article

Tuesday 20 October 2015

Blog Redesign

You might notice some changes to my blog - OK, it's quite obvious, I've changed the name, and the background etc. This is linked with a plan to change the content somewhat. Instead of having two blogs, one for craft and the other for writing, I'm merging them together hence the title: Words and Patterns. I plan to write a lot more besides - book reviews, lifestyle posts, updates on my little boy, photography etc. that wouldn't have fit in well before.

There are a lot of changes going on in my life at the moment. Along with Andrew and Jem I've moved out of St Andrews down to Kenilworth in Warwickshire to stay with family until Andrew finds a job. I am once again a stay-at-home Mum and feeling very lucky to be spending this precious time with my boy. Speaking of the boy, he just turned one, and had three first birthday parties to mark the occasion. I think he might be a little confused, but the main thing is that we all ate a lot of cake!

I've been trying out some new craft ideas, my facebook friends will have seen glimpses already, but I'm planning some posts soon to show what I've been up to. Eventually, I'm hoping to become a work-at-home Mum, and use some of the creative skills I've been developing to start a small business.

Keep on the look out for posts in the near future, I've a lot to tell you about!

Saturday 8 August 2015

What is this Life?

I saw a wonderful thing
 
And reached for my phone
 
But it wasn't there
 
So I stood and stared
 
At the heron in the tree
 
On my own.

Tuesday 14 April 2015

A Book

I've written a book. You might like it, it's a collection of seven short stories. They share a theme of mysticism, there are some miracles too. I decided to publish it on Amazon just to see how it goes and so that you can buy a copy of my first book if you want to. Here's the link: http://tinyurl.com/pms3hhu

You can download it to your kindle or if you don't have one, you can also read it on a smartphone or PC.

It all began with the story below which I posted here as a tribute to my Grandad a while ago.


If you enjoy the book and would like to do me a massive favour please share the link on Facebook or Twitter or wherever you share things, or leave me a nice Amazon review.

Love,

Naomi


Wild Rosie

A car is pulled up at the side of a small road that winds around a West Country hill. The long grass of the verge sprinkles the tyres with water droplets from a recent shower. Two men are standing conversing by a gate which cuts in two the thick lush hedgerow. In the bushes the wildflowers grow truly wild, blooming impatiently and out of turn. One of the men is old and stately, talking to the middle distance, his voice hushed with gravity. The younger of the two, black hair just beginning to turn grey listens intently with both eyes and ears. When it is his turn to speak he is louder and more enthusiastic, encouraging. Three gangly children are in the back of the car, usually noisy and pre-occupied, they are now straining to see and hear the conversation. They have heard the story before.


Unaccounted years earlier, on this same spot (even though they are not sure of it) a man and a boy passed through the gate. The boy was barely six years old. His fair hair was almost white, he had a round gentle face, and he gazed intently at his father through palest blue eyes. His father, the sturdy man in a white shirt and black waistcoat holding the child’s chubby hand, was striding at a pace which caused the boy to trot to keep up as they travelled up the narrow grassy path between the hedgerows.

The child had not paid attention and didn’t know where they were going, but it felt like an adventure, climbing the hill out of the village, and taking the mysterious path away from the road, so he didn’t complain. Presently they were approaching a tumbledown cottage in a clearing - the kind that belongs in a fairy tale. Creeping shrubs climbed the walls, at one corner a spray of elderflowers leaned out from the house. It was a summer’s day, but smoke was rising from the chimney in swirls. A lady, stooped and trembling with age emerged from the front door, apparently to tend to her plants in the garden, but upon seeing the approaching visitors, she rose to her full height and extended a hand to wave.

They arrived and were shown in.

“Hello Child,” the old lady began, “your pa finally brought you ‘ere. I ’as been looking forward to meetin’ you.” Her voice was soft, but strong with authority. The child was silent with wonder. Father looked down at the boy, prompting him. The child searched his memory and discovered what his mother had told him to say,
“You have a lovely home.” He said quickly and, thinking about it, began to look around. There were dark chests of drawers lining the walls; a fireplace, where a kettle was warming. The room was lit by the pale sunlight drawn through the windows which casted shadows upon the cobwebbed corners. Despite the fire, on that summer day the one room cottage seemed cold. 

“Oh, it ain’t my ‘ouse.”

“Whose is it?” answered the boy, beginning to find his voice.

“It belongs to Rosie. Do you know who Rosie is?” She didn’t wait for him to shake his head - with a twinkle in the corner of her eye she continued “she’s your great, great,” as the little boy brought his grubby fingers up to his face to count, a secret and almost imperceptible grin spread across the wrinkled face, “great, great…great grandma.”

The Father caught her eye and turned away to tend the fire.

“Is she very, very old?” asked the child, now inquisitive.

“Oh, o’course, she’s very old. Even older’n me. She was born a very long time ago. I’ll tell you about ‘er. She’s a wise woman. She knows every plant and flower in the forest, and she knows which ones’ll do you good and which ones’ll do you ill.”

“How does she know?” asked the child.

“She’s tried ‘em all.  She’s made ‘em into medicines and poultices and draughts and the like, and tried ‘em all on ‘erself.”

“Why didn’t they make her ill?

“Because she knows when to spit. If it smells evil, or tastes evil or looks evil, then it probably is. Mind you it migh’ not be. A little migh’ do you good if you’re ill. She knows. And she wrote it all down in a fashion, e’en though she can’t write. She’s got lots of drawers an’ a system, an’ if you know the system and you ‘eard all ‘er stories then you know what will cure and what won’t. An’ that I do and that I did and that I know.”

“Is she magic?”

“No she ain’t magic, and don’t you go lettin’ ‘er hear you sayin’ that, she’d be mightily insulted.”

“Well how has she lived so long?”

“I’ll tell you that. She never did no magic. She’s making a point. When she were young, a long time ago, there was those who thought that women like ‘er - wise women o’ the forest - was magic just as you say, and that they consorted wi’ demons in the night, and that they cast spells an’ made potions. And they hunted them, an’ a lot of women was killed. You see now ‘ere she is livin’ an’ she’s makin’ ‘er point.”

The boy was bewildered, too much so to answer the old lady. He continued to stare up at her, as she stared down at him, with her back hunched over in a perfect curve. Her once white apron covered a faded blue cotton dress, and her large feet protruded rudely beneath. She was a singular character and had ignited the boy’s curiosity.

“Well, boy.”

“What?”

“Don’t you think it’s about time you met ‘er? You came to see ‘er didn’t you?” He consented with an unblinking gaze.

“She’s upstairs, careful on the ladder, I’ll follow right behind you.”

The boy emerged into a loft space, stark and dusty and sprinkled with flecks of light coming through the spaces in between the tiles. There was a figure a few paces away, near a small window in the gable end. He turned back to the old lady following,

“Should I call her great, great…” She almost chuckled as the chubby fingers emerged again from behind his back.

“Rosie’ll do just fine. She likes a child quite enough for ‘is own sakes, doesn’t care much ‘ow you’re related. She’s old enough and ‘ad enough children an’ grandchildren not to worry ‘bout that any more. Call ‘er Rosie, sure she would’ha had another name when she were born, near enough to your own I’d ‘azard a guess, since we’re all family together. But she made a name for ‘erself round ‘ere and that name were Wild Rosie. There’s people come from the village whenever they get ill, an’ they know I got all the medicines and poultices and draughts, but they won’t get well will they? No, they won’t get well ‘til they seen Wild Rosie.

“You know why that is boy?”

The wide eyed boy shook his head in the gloom.

“It’s because they think ‘emselves better. Many of ‘em thought ‘emselves ill. One day they didn’t want to work so’s they found a little niggle and let it grow to a big one all until they find out it’s better to be well, so now they want to get better again. The medicines and poultices help some, but it’s thoughts that help the most. Go on. Go over there, she can’t see you ‘ere.”

The child walked with measured footsteps towards the thin figure. She sat in a squeaking rocking chair. Bony knees dented the flow of her tired nightgown, delicate with wear. Her wispy hair, matted in places formed an ethereal veil around her face, translucent in the dim light from the dusty window. Deep wrinkles contoured every feature of bony face. Her countenance was grey and sharp, but she had kind eyes; the gleam of life shone out of them. 

The little boy approached her and stood boldly, his stomach protruding and little fists by his sides, like only a six year old can, by her chair,

“Hello Rosie” he said.

Her pale blue eyes rested on the shining round face as if noticing him for the first time. Her gaze softened and she slowly nodded. A slight smile disturbed the papery wrinkles around her mouth, communicating the familial affection of someone very old for someone very small. She continued rocking slowly in her chair, and in her bony fingers, two knitting needles moved in slow motion. She was knitting, there was no yarn.

“What are you knitting?” The bold little boy asked her.

The very old lady replied with a slow, knowing blink from her tired reddened eyelids.

“What is she knitting?” he asked turning to the other lady.

“Dreams, son. Imaginin’s.”

“Whose dreams?”

“Who knows boy, maybe yours an’ mine.”

He watched her for a while, and she watched him. The other old lady’s footsteps approached behind him, and lifted him up to kiss the delicate ivory cheek. He was afraid he’d hurt her. The skin was dry and he thought he felt a cold bone beneath. She seemed to blush a little, and her smile broadened.

He descended the rickety ladder again asking,
“How does she get up and down here?”

“She don’t, not on ‘er own. Most o’ the time she likes to stay up there. Then when she’s needed down in the village, someone comes up an’ we lower ‘er down in a chair. Then the strappin’ lads carry ‘er down to the village. She don’t go much anymore. Only for the dyin’. She’ll always be there if it’s for the dyin’ particurly if it’s one o’ the old ones. She’s known ‘em all from birth, remembers ‘em from when they was babies bein’ born. I tole you some won’t get well ‘til they seen Wild Rosie, I tell you now, there’s some as won’t die ‘til they seen ‘er neither.”

“What does she do when they die?”

“She sits with ‘em, stays with ‘em. They used to say she said spells over them, or she enchanted them to sleep but that ain’t it. She keeps ‘em company and she praps prays for ‘em as they go, an’ it helps ‘em die properly.”

“When will she die?”

“What do you mean by that boy?”

“She’s so old.”

“Hundreds of years old, quite righ’.”

“Will she live forever?”

“I tole you boy she migh’ be a wise woman, but she ain’t magic. Sure she’ll die one day. When they don’t need her no more.”

The boy’s father had brewed some nettle tea over the fire, so they sat with him, the boy sinking into a woollen cushion, dull with repeated use and ash from the open fire. Father told the old lady all the news from the village. He gave her the basket of bread and meat he’d brought, which she promptly stashed away a creaky cupboard.

When the visit was over, and they left the house, the little boy waited until they were a short distance away and whispered to his father.

“She’s magic isn’t she?”

“Why do you think that?” he replied,

“She’s hundreds of years old and she’s still alive, and she can make medicines to make people well, and she’s tried all the plants that make you ill but she never got ill, and people come to see her and they get better, and she knits my dreams.”

“She knits your dreams?” His father repeated, ever so slightly surprised.

“Yes, she knits with invisible wool to make dreams.”

“She must be magic then” his father said, turning his eyes again to the path, and they descended to the village.



The old man and the younger man get back in the car. It’s too wet, and too late to try walking the path, the old man says. The children’s imaginations stir. Is he scared that she won’t be there, that the story was just too fanciful, or the village no longer needed her and she died? Or is he scared that she will be there, still rocking in the dim light of a rainy day, and the story will continue?


 

Monday 23 February 2015

The Night Feed

It's dark. I'm sucking my thumb but it's not helping, everything is hazy, I'm not quite awake. My throat makes little groaning noises but I'm concentrating on my thumb so I don't listen to them. I hear a rustle of fabric and a yawn. I hear a click and there is light. My eyes close a little but I relax. Mummy is coming.

Her hands slot under my arms. Firmly, she pulls me up and out of the cot. Everything is still misty. It might be a dream but I smell her. She holds me and I am warm and safe.

I am nestled in her arms. She brings me close to her. She is soft, I burrow closer. Then the milk comes - too fast to begin with and I come up gasping and spluttering. She lets me try again, I drink it in with long draws, it is clear and refreshing at first and then rich and creamy. It is warm in my mouth. I can feel how it travels down to fill my stomach. I feel as though I could drink all night and still want more, I pull in more.

I hear breathing. I look up. There is Daddy's back. The covers have fallen down past his shoulders. I watch. Perhaps he will move. Mummy is looking at me. She brings me back and I remember the milk. I drink quickly, hurrying to take in as much as I can.

Her arms surround me again. I don't remember where I am. I lean into her shoulder as she picks me up. I see the room moving around us. We walk a few steps and then she swings me around and down. I land softly in the cot. She arranges my blankets and tucks the fluffy bear in beside me. Her face pulls away and she stands to leave me. I feel her hand pat my tummy. I feel safe. Where is my thumb?

The dark comes back with a click. My thumb finds my mouth. I watch the blackness disappear behind my eyelids. I can't remember where I am. My thoughts fade, I hear breathing, I remember Mummy and Daddy.

Sunday 8 February 2015

Honour


Honour your father and your mother (Ex 20:12)

I saw a conversation recently on a mums’ internet forum that asked contributors ‘What makes you feel like a Mum?’ A lot of the answers were about the little things like finding toys or snacks at the bottom of your handbag – as annoying as that is, it does send a warm glow through you! For many though, the most poignant moments of motherhood come when their child looks to them for comfort - when they are hurt, upset or frightened and it is Mother they turn to.

It is only very recently that my son has developed the habit of crying when I pass him to someone new for a cuddle. As bad as I feel for the poor people whose affection he rejects so cruelly, there is a wonderful sense of satisfaction in being the person he comes back to, the one who can stop him crying. That is what makes me know that I am a mother. It makes me feel wanted and needed, in coming back to me every time, in seeking me out for reassurance he distinguishes me, sets me apart from everyone else. In fact, to me, it is an honour to be the person that he needs. He honours me just by wanting me; thus in a way he fulfills the commandment to ‘honour your father and your mother’ without even knowing it. I know too that my own parents would hate to think that in my hour of need that I would hesitate to call upon them. They recently impressed upon me exactly how quickly they would rush to be by my side if the need arose. I hope that they would be honoured to know that they will be my first call if my husband and I are ever in need.

What does the commandment to ‘honour your father and mother’ really mean? Before I was a parent I always imagined it meant to obey them, but now I think there is more to it than just that. Parenthood is a wonderful state but also one that is scary. Scary because there is such responsibility attached. The physical, emotional and spiritual wellbeing of my child now lies entirely in my hands and those of my husband. To achieve in any of these areas I need one thing from my son. I need him to recognise my parenthood. As he grows up that recognition will take many forms. As a toddler and young child he will need to learn to listen to his parents and do as they say. When he is older he will need to discover how to trust our judgement and our care for him.  Older still and he will have to respect our values. None of this will come without trials and difficulty, patience will be required on both sides, of course. One essential element, however, will remain the same through it all. If I live to one hundred, and he is seventy-five, I will still want him to come to me when he needs comfort. I believe that that is the very simplest and most fundamental way a child can acknowledge and give honour to a parent.

Natually, this idea finds a parallel in the Christian relationship with God as Father. It is not only when we sing his praises that we give God honour, but also when we, like Christ at Gethsemane, bring our deepest fears and most painful experiences to him in prayer. In so doing, we recognise that it is God who can truly offer comfort, who can enable us to shoulder the burden, who can refresh our thirsty souls. Here, prayer and worship are again intertwined. As with God the Father, so with Mary the Mother of the Church, we do her honour not only when we proclaim the scriptural greeting ‘Hail Mary, full of grace’ but right through to our humble request: ‘pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.’

So we are called to honour both our earthly and our heavenly parents by acknowledging and respecting their parenthood. By valuing our parents’ opinions, by respecting their judgements, by acknowledging their care and by seeking them out in times of hardship.